How To Save A Relationship – 7 Steps You Need To Know
October 20, 2009 by Paul 'PJ' Jackson
Filed under Dating Tips
If you’ve been wondering how to save a relationship, below are 7 simple steps you can take to accomplish this, but first a little story. Sean and Lizzy both work hard. Sean works long hours at the office, and Lizzy spends her time tending to the children. Sean doesn’t feel she has time for him, and Lizzy thinks Sean doesn’t have time for her. Can their relationship be saved? Should it be saved?
First off you have to decide if the relationship is worth saving. Most relationships can be saved with hard work, but both people have to decide to be committed to saving it. If one of the parties involved isn’t willing, then not much can be done to save the relationship.
There are plenty of people you pass on the streets every day who stay in relationships because they are convenient, or stay with the marriage because of the kids, but that’s just not enough. The key to how to save a relationship is that both parties have to mutually decide that it is worth saving.
The next thing to do is zone in on the problem or problems in the relationships. One of the biggest issues faced with how to save a relationship is that people come to the conclusion that symptoms are actually problems. This is a common mistake, don’t make it. Focus on the actual problems.
An affair is something that often causes break ups, and most people see it as the problem, but more often than not, the affair is the symptom of the true problem. For example, a lack of true intimacy could be the actual problem. Most of us would look at the situation and say the affair caused the break up, but in actuality it was the symptom of the problem and intimacy was the core problem. If you aren’t able to deal with the real problem, you will be in trouble. You may be able to stop another affair with guilt, but another problem, like pornography addiction, may arise in it’s place.
Your relationship can only be saved when you strip down the symptoms and start to deal with the core issues.
After the real problems have been realized, you have to sit down with your partner and have a conversation. Speak what’s on your mind and listen to them while they verbalize their feelings. Hold your partners hand while you listen to show that even if you’re emotional, you want to reconnect. If your partner brings up something that hurts you, remember that it’s not an attempt to hurt you but an attempt to show that they want to improve your relationship.
For example, if your problem is that you don’t spend time together like you used to, take a weekend getaway or set up a date night each week. Even if the date night is Wednesday, you’re spending time together. Then, you and your partner can take turns thinking up fun and exciting ways to spend your date night.
If communication is your issue, schedule 20 minutes before bed when you turn off the TV, shut down the computer and silence your phone and just talk, just the two of you. And, then take action and do it.
And Finally, you must realize that saving a relationship is a process. Often you will go two steps ahead and take one step back. There will be pain and joy as you move along. Just remember to be quick to apologize and slow to place blame.
Are you in a relationship that’s worth saving? If you are, stay committed to saving it and follow the advice in this article.
Want to find out more about How To Save Your Relationship, then visit Paul ‘PJ’ Jackson’s site and discover if you can Save Your Relationship or if it is doomed.
healthy tea (1)
Yes the relationship of Sean and Lizzy can definitely
be saved and should be saved. The couple should have a
serious conversation and work on the problems.
Bring up good memories: Go in places that remind you good times;
places that you used to go when you were dating. It Really helps couples refresh their love .
Trust me if there is “Love” in this relationship, then definitely things will work out.
Remember: Communication is one the most important keys to a very good marriage